Sunday, December 2, 2007
Midnight The Wonder Cat here. I don't understand humans. They put a great big tree inside the house and they tell me NOT to climb it. I have been looking out of the window all my life at the trees I wish I could climb...then one day they bring one inside and I'm in heaven! How am I supposed to resist a tree inside the house? I'm a house cat!!! My resolve lasted as long as the humans presence in the room, then the tree was all mine! How was I supposed to know it would fall over? I can't wait till they put it up again! I can't wait to climb it again!
Saturday, November 24, 2007
I'm not a bad cat, but sometimes I do bad things. I don't think that is fair that Santa can withhold catnip (and mousies, and scratching posts, and cheese, and fishes, and cat treats from me). I don't do anything that any normal house cat wouldn't do! Why would I care whether the drapes are new or not? I love to climb! (BTW thanks l'artist for the new drapes, they are much easier to get my claws into then the old ones.) So all I'm saying is why does a human who lives in the North Pole get to decide whether I get catnip? I have never even met the guy! Its a well known fact that I need catnip! I need catnip like Teddy needs me to fall asleep. Its just a fact. So please Santa, when you come down the chimney this year don't forget the catnip.
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
Midnight here. The time is Midnight, (MY favorite time) and L'artist is sleeping. OK, so thats a total fabrication, she never sleeps before 3 am...but anyway she's shut herself in her room and I'm out here all alone. The lights are out. The moon is shining brightly through the window. I have spent the last ten minutes sitting on the window sill watching bats swoop around the lamp across the street. The bats are feeding on moths. (I bet bats taste yummy!) Now is the perfect time to sing! I'll just throw back my head and "MoaWWwwwWWWwwwwwww Maowwwww MaowwwwwWWWwwwWWWww" and serenade the moon!
Thursday, September 13, 2007
I have tried walking up to said human and clearly stating its dinner time. I got petted and told to stop walking on her newspaper. Oh, if only I had thumbs!
Sunday, August 26, 2007
Sometimes I want to play, but I don't want to get up off the couch. For this we felines come specially prepared. We have tails. I love my tail. The end twitches and I see the movement out of the corner of my eye. I look. It twitches again to tempt me. It twitches faster to torment me. I try to raise it a bit. I grab it with my front paws. I hug it to me its not getting away. I contemplate my victory, and I let go. It springs away. I jump up. I run to chase it. Its getting away. I sit on it. I fall backwards. It got away again...
Wednesday, August 1, 2007
I'm getting ready for halloween already. Halloween is my favorite holliday. How could it not be? Plastic spiders to kick around the floor, that neat web stuff to pull down and spread around the house, pumpkins to hide in (I even like cleaning that stick junk off my coat). Plus all the fun crinkly candy wrappers I get to steel out out the garbage. L'artiste seems happier too, I think its the chocolate!
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
Monday, June 25, 2007
Ok, this is not funny. I said I didn't want to go to the vets and here I am in the green box! Not even becoming invisible helped today. Oh the cruelty, the injustice, the pure unadulterated evil of you humans. Let me out! Let me out! Pleeeeeeaaaase let me out! I hate the box, hate the car, hate the sniffing dogs, hate the guy in the white coat, and why are they always putting needles in me? Oh, let me out!
Monday, June 18, 2007
THE GREEN BOX! The tool of the devil! Oh what did I do to deserve this? I AM NOT GOING TO THE VETS AND THATS FINAL! I am making myself invisible and one can not shove one into the evil green box who one cannot see! I am not above biting the hand that feeds me you know. I'm not here. You can't see me and I am not going!
Thursday, June 14, 2007
I am a genius with mad skills. Who would think that a cat could fit in guitar, let alone be able to work out that the strings needed to be cut first! Genius. Pure unadulterated brilliance! I'm so smart!
Now how do I get out? Darn...didn't plan that one so well. "Help!"
Sunday, June 10, 2007
Friday, June 8, 2007
The humans keep changing my environment. Today is was a vase of flowers on my favorite jumping off place. Well, I suppose I didn't mind that so much. Flower stems feel great between my teeth and it did give me a chance to do some re-organizing of my own. Plus flower heads are fun to kick around on the floor! I wouldn't suggest eating the petals of this kind though. Made me sick all over the new rug. As an aside, I love this picture. I'm so handsome!
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
All stop to admire the slendifousness that is me! Pay attention to me. I'm the cutest thing on four legs and I'm dieing for a belly rub. Look at it. Here it is. I know you want it. I know you cannot resist my fuzzy belly. Here it is. Come 'n get it!
Monday, June 4, 2007
Midnight the Wonder Cat here. Getting ready for my close-up. Posing for portraits isn't all its cracked up to be. There is all the preening and prepping that I have to do. It can take hours for a full tongue bath. I have to watch my figure, (catnip helps). There's all the extra naps I need to take to keep the bags from under my eyes. The manicures, (though l'artiste calls it "scrathing the couch", how vulgar!) which have to be repeated often. Then there is finding just the right pose and holding it long enough for l'artiste to capture my spendiforous likeness. Its the price I pay for immortality. The egyptians had it right when they worshipped cats!
Saturday, June 2, 2007
Today I became invisible. My human left the room. When she came back I was noowhere to be seen! She called me and called me. She looked under the sofa and the coffee table. She looked in the other room. She looked behind the tv. She looked in the kitchen and bathroom. She looked in my bed and in that cardboard box by the door. But it was no use because I was invisible.
I am so clever! She couldn't find me. She even said out loud, "he definately isn't on the sofa...". Just when she said she was going to miss me, I sprung out from behind my...I mean I reappeared! I am a genius! No human is a match for my utter brilliance!
Friday, June 1, 2007
Thursday, May 31, 2007
L'artiste did it again. Drew me with these stupid fairy wings, and I AM NOT AMUSED! I suppose its a bit foolish to question ones creator. That tends to come back at you. Georgina if you read this you are wonderfully creative, stunningly beautiful, ummmmmmm shoot what else? Oh yeah...exceptionally generous, kind, intelligent, loving and forgiving!
Oh come on, don't make me beg! Begging is extreamely undignified for a feline! I didn't mean it when I said I think you may be crazy! You're sane ok?
Welcome to the personal blog of the one and only, Midninght the Wonder Cat. This blog details the daily adventures of me, Midnight the Wonder Cat. Why Wonder Cat? Cuz thats the title l'artiste gave me. Why did she do that? How should I know? I'm a painting. L'artiste sells me on ebay. Why? I think she may be crazy...don't tell her I said so, or she'll draw me with those stupid wings again. What kind of person puts halloween fairy wings on a cat?
Oh no! I hear thunder! I'm outta here!